Top 70 Dad Jokes 2024

Do you have a dad joke book or are you just one of those people who will simply take the extra effort and want all of the uber corny jokes that will make the people smile? Either way, you would find this list of the top 70 dad jokes for 2024 unbelievably entertaining and filled with a flying bucket of cheesy puns and play on words. From food-related puns to science fiction jokes to dad-approved animal humor, all the classic joke categories are here, updated with fresh, family-friendly offerings. Whether you want to make your friends and family laugh or just need a smile yourself, you’re guaranteed to find plenty of humorous one-liners-running the gamut from silly to clever-in this collection. Now get ready for eye rolls and grins galore as you make your way through the past pastures of pun-derful dad joke land!

Food for Thought Jokes

1. Why was the sandwich feeling down in the dumps? It was struggling with some sourdough blues.
2. I said to my partner her brow seemed high, she appeared quite startled.
3. What took the cake to the physician? It wasn’t feeling quite up to snuff.
4. What did the grape Tweet when it got squashed? Not a peep, just a little wine leakage.
5. Why did the fruit visit the medico? It wasn’t feeling its peeling best.

Puns-itive

6. Why did the scarefellow win an accolade? For standing exceptional in the field of crops.
7. What do you refer to a counterfeit noodle? An inaccurate pasta.
8. Why did the two-wheeler topple over? It was too worn-out to stand.
9. I’m perusing a paperback regarding the law of gravity. It’s impossible to put aside!
10. Why did the small barnyard fowl traverse the playground equipment? To arrive at the second slide across.

Animal Crackers Jokes

11. Why did the feline join a band? To be the purr-cussionist.
12. What do you call cows playing instruments? A moo-sical band.
13. Why did the elephant quit the circus? It was tired of working for peanuts.
14. Why did the rabbit visit the doctor? For some hare care.
15. What do you call a bear that has no socks? Barefoot.

Tech Support Jokes

16. Why did the computer visit the medico? It had contracted a virus!
17. Why did the robot opt for a diet? It wanted to shed some bytes.
18. What do you refer to a downcast computer? A blue screen.
19. Why did the phone embark on therapy? It had quite a few hang-ups.
20. Why did the internet embark on therapy? It was feeling rather disconnected.

Travel Troubles Jokes

21. Why did the tourist bring a ladder to Paris? To elevate their experience.
22. Why did the aircraft break up with the airport? It needed some space.
23. What did the shoreline say when the tide came in? Long time, no sea.
24. Why did the mountain trekker bring a pillow along? For a peak rest if needed.
25. Why did the tourist bring a magnet to the museum? To attract some attention.

Science Friction Jokes

26. Why did the atom lose its job? It couldn’t bond with coworkers.
27. Why did the scientist remove the doorbell? To win the no-bell prize.
28. Why did the astronaut break up with their partner? It needed some space.
29. What did the DNA say to the RNA? “Fancy pairing up?”
30. Why did the physicist break up with their partner? Mass attraction but gravity was overwhelming.

School Daze Jokes

31. Why did the textbook appear so dismal? Too many problems.
32. Why did the educator bring a ladder to work? To elevate teaching.
33. What did the calculator say to the math problem? “Many problems you’ve got.”
34. Why did the student bring a magnet to class? To attract good marks.
35. Why did the instructor become a baker? In need of dough, it kneaded some.

Random Acts of Dadness Jokes

36. Why did the mushroom get invited to parties? As quite the fun-gi.
37. Why did the pencil break up with the eraser? A sharp decision.
38. What do you call an opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener.
39. Why did the mirror visit therapy? Feeling rather reflective.
40. Why did the clock visit therapy? Wound up it was feeling.

More Puns-itive

41. Why did the baker visit the bank? In need of dough.
42. Why did the mushroom attend the party? As quite the fun-gi.
43. What do you call cows playing video games? A herd of gamers.
44. Why did the orange halt mid-road? Depleted its juice it had.
45. Why did the rabbit visit the physician? In need of hare care.

Even More Puns-itive

46. Why did the screen see the doctor? A glitch or two it felt.
47. What do you call a dear with no socks? Darefoot.
48. Why did the fruit pay the doc a visit? Not peeling with great sensation it was.
49. Why did the astronaut take a pillow to the moon? For galaxy comfort it yearned.
50. Why did the egg embark on therapy? Under pressure it was starting to crack.

More Science Jokes

51. Why was the surface of the moon damp? Because of all the astro-nots!
52. What do you call a lab experiment that’s gone wrong? A sci-failure.
53. What do you call a terrified formula? A scared equation.
54. Why did the scientific calculator want to retire? It lost its digits.
55. What do you call a brave virus? A virus-hero.

Sports Center Jokes

56. What do you call a pile of kittens? A meow-ntain.
57. Why did the baseball glove go to jail? It was accused of first base.
58. What do you call a scaredy cat gymnast? A panic vault.
59. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they’d be bagels.
60. What do you call a droid that’s good at basketball? A droid-kan.

Traveling Jokes

61. Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? Swarm.
62. Why do chickens make great detectives? They always get to the point.
63. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
64. Why can’t a bike stand on its own? It’s too tired!
65. What do you call the cheese that is not yours? Nacho cheese.

At the Office Jokes

66. Why was the photocopier feeling stressed? It had a lot more on its plate.
67. What do you call a lazy computer? A pro-crastinator.
68. What did the stapler do on vacation? It relaxed and did some binding.
69. Why did the pencil call in sick? Because it had a case of the points.
70. Why do chickens make great detectives? They always get to the point.